Monday, July 20, 2009

Thinking Heavy

I hung out with three super awesome chicks yesterday. Two are married, one is looking, and I am hanging gloriously in the middle. They told me any guy who doesn't claim you as his own - meaning 'girlfriend' - probably doesn't actually want you. That doesn't hurt my feelings. It's frankly just a shot of reality, right? But he's different. I believe that. There's lots of things playing into his decisions. One being that he is leaving in December. Boo for that. But that thought haunts me a bit and I'm sitting here questioning its validity. Maybe they are right. And then Mr. TrashMouth tells me that it's a strong signal and that things are great now, but if something better comes along, well... Hmmm. Better. That's a matter of perspective. I'm pretty great. I know that. Not perfect. But I am a catch, as Max puts it.

So what do I listen to? Him. My guy. That's who. Because I believe him and I trust him. He's unique. And generalizations don't fit him so well. All I can say is that it's real hard being in this and feeling like I do without it coming back. I'm not sure my tender heart can last very long in that kind of a space.


lisa said...

I would just like to point out that I was not in agreement with the others need for him to "claim" you. I think you two have a perfectly lovely relationship and it works for you two and that is all that matters. Love.

Susanne said...

It was Steve Harvey who said if he doesn't claim you, he doesn't love you and he's on his third marriage... pretty well known he cheated on wife number 2 with wife number 3!~ not sure you should worry too much about his relationship advice.

Stick with your gut sister! :)