Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Why Vegas Is Crazy


So, my first trip to Vegas... how exciting. I wasn't sure what to expect, but I came away with some of the most hilarious stories. Why have I not travelled more? That has got to change.

So, our last night in Vegas we were living it up. I had not seen Elvis anywhere. And when a girl goes to Vegas, you know she can't leave until she sees the King. I was super excited to see a middle aged totally stylin' Elvis coming down the Strip. He stopped so I could get a picture on my phone. I will have you know - the smile on my face is totally fake. That dude was groping me big time all up the side of my body. I couldn't get away from him fast enough. What a nasty freak.

Of course, right as I'm stepping away, one of the girls with us comes around the corner and she's like, "OH, ELVIS! We have to get more pictures!!!" I offered to be the one to take the photo but she wasn't having it. So, of course, all the girls in our group hand their cameras to strangers who have no idea how to work the damn cameras. And there I am standing next to NASTY Elvis being finger groped by what I can only guess is an ex-convict with Hepatitis B, crabs, and gonorrhea while some slow-ass tourists figure out how to push a button.

And so what we have is a photo of six beautiful, smiling women, one freak-nasty Elvis.... and me. With a look of pure disgust and an old man's hand about 2 centimeters away from getting a handful of booby.

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