Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Pigsty

I was just gone for about 12 days. It's a long time to be away from home! As I was coming back, I realized how much I missed my friends and how much I've been away this summer. I wouldn't say I regret it, but it's time to make a little change, I think. I need to be in town more. I adore Max. I really do. And we always have a wonderful time together. But I can't sacrifice my friendships for the sake of being in the same vicinity as Max.

I woke up this morning and realized... my room is a pigsty, my bill paying is a pigsty, my car is a pigsty, and I haven't fulfilled a few committments I set out to complete this summer. It's not good. And really, because of the hustle-bustle, I feel I am living in a typhoon and my whole life is a pigsty. I've let my connection with my God slide, too and I don't feel ANYTHING stable in my life. Nothing. It's affecting me for sure.

I want to develop a system of being. So my house isn't a torrential mess. So my bills are paid on time. So I can balance time better. So I can retain the stable ground of my faith. So I can pursue friendships.

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